Dear Becca: (A Dear So&So Installation)

[Dear So&So is a series of intimate letters between strangers that highlights #mentalhealth
 in #motherhood with a specific focus on #entrepreneurs, #smallbusinessowners and #artists.]
 
 
 
Dear Becca,
 
Your husband and your bestie call you Bec, but I'm not there yet, so we'll stick with Becca for the time being.  They had to earn that ultra-short nickname – and they did by always sticking by you.  Yeah, you've had your fair share of tough things thrown at you.  Postpartum depression after kiddo number two (now 5) and toss in severe anxiety and some related eating issues.  It doesn't seem super easy being you. 
 
But at the same time, you are so damn cool.
 
 
Like, is there anyone that doesn’t want to be your friend?  Do your kids just swoon because you are legit the coolest mom? I want to go out to brunch with you, to cry on your shoulder.  And that's how you come across.  As a human.  A very, very cool and also-sometimes-struggling-too human. You normalize the basics of life, in this is critical in these days of wishing we had wonder woman status.
  
Thanks for showing us that you went and sat on the couch and watched TV while your husband did bedtime.  Thanks for showing us that you built a playground in your back yard because going to the playground with your kids is too scary. Thanks for showing us what it is to live life even though you are much of the time scared of being scared. Thanks for showing us that we aren't the sum of our hardest moments.
 
 
If there are any haters around you, they've got to go. Because you're in the take-no-shit part of healing. You are your own harshest negative voice, just like us. You told me that that "well worn paths are easiest to slide down." The spirals of guilt and shame you (still) struggle with are present - despite the joy you feel filling up your life. 
 
That's the thing about living and simultaneously struggling with mental health – it's not always pretty.  And yet, you keep showing up, you keep sharing and you keep doing the hard things that the rest of the world often makes look easy.  Your big gift to us is your willingness to be seen.  As you put it, "It's exhausting to be anyone other than myself."  And we wouldn't have it any other way. 
  
Keep showing up and keep shining your light.
 
xoxox,
Hannah
 
Ps. To learn more about Rebecca Fox Starr please check out her book, her blog and her instagram